Recent Carterism #1:  Earlier this week Carter spent one on one time with his Grandma. I promised my mom that before we left the state, she would get some one on one time with each grandson.  When I went to do the kid swap, exchanging Cody for Carter, it came up in conversation that, according to my mom, Carter has said the word “condom” distinctly and at multiple times for no apparent reason while at the playground.  She played the Grandma Card and decided to pretend she had not heard it.

My first reaction was one of shock as I wondered where and from whom he would have learned that word.  I am not at all opposed to him knowing about condoms and I fully plan on being that mom who leaves a bowl of them in a discrete place in the bathroom when the boys are older (note: I say this now, but when the time comes I reserve the right to change my mind).  But he is six and if he is going to learn about the birds and the bees and how to keep them safely separated, it should really be from me or Husband.

All of these things flashed through my mind and then I looked across the room at him.  He was singing and dancing, completely unaware that he was doing it.  Then I smiled and knew that he was not saying “condom” at all.

I am a bit ashamed to admit this, but when Psy’s Gangnam Style video went viral on YouTube, we may have watched it a time or two hundred.  We may continue to watch it from time to time.  The boys love it and mimic the dance moves.  Carter has never mastered the lyrics but instead belts out in a loud and slightly off key singing-shout “WHOOMP, WHOOMP WHOOMP, WHOOMP – WHOOP UM’ CONDOMSTYLE!”  For those of you who live under a bigger rock than I and have no idea what I am talking about – here you go.  Feel free to insert Carter’s lyrics.

Recent Carterism #2:  In celebration of receiving my State of Washington Education Certificate in the mail yesterday, we decided to go out to dinner.  It was just Husband, Carter and myself as this is the week Cody gets one on one time with his Grandma.

As we sat in the restaurant enjoying our meal, the World Cup match between the US and Germany was being replayed in the bar right next to us.  Carter was mesmerized, as he is anytime he is around a TV that is on.  The score was zero to zero and we didn’t have the heart to tell him the fate of the game was already sealed with the US being the loosing team.

On the TV, some random person was interviewing another random person and from what I could determine, the interviewee was one of the US players (can you tell I don’t watch soccer).  The heading on the top of the screen read “Halftime”.  I commented to Husband that I did not know soccer had halftime.  Carter, overhearing but misunderstanding, said “Naptimes?  They have naptimes in soccer?”

It has been a while since I have shared any Carterisms with you.  It is not because he has stopped providing me with these gems of humor and perspective, I have simply not been taking the time to write them down.  It is a shame for I find them so funny and I know these moments are quickly passing me by.  So I have captured these two for me more than you – although I hope you enjoy them.